🎧 Satan’s most personal fucking episode yet. The Prince of Darkness experiences a complete mental breakdown when ABC suspends Jimmy Kimmel INDEFINITELY for making jokes about the comedy killer in chief, while Brian Kilmeade stays on air after literally advocating for executing homeless people with “involuntary lethal injection.” This isn’t just about losing Satan’s nightly comfort watch—it’s about America crossing the authoritarian Rubicon with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer to democracy’s skull. Trump declared networks “aren’t allowed” to criticize him, the FCC has made it happen, and corporations folded faster than Superman on laundry day because they value their $6.2 billion mergers more than free speech.
Meanwhile, the spray-tanned sack of personality disorders designated “Antifa” as a terrorist organization (ANTIFA ISN’T EVEN AN ORGANIZATION—it’s literally just being anti-fascist), and the DOJ deleted their own study showing right-wing extremists kill 7X more people than the left. Our demonic correspondents deliver scorching analysis: Nyarlathotep dissects the propaganda mindfuck of declaring IDEAS as terrorism, while Beelzebub exposes the corporate cowardice that killed comedy to protect profits. Satan’s final verdict: “Taking away the comedy doesn’t make the fascism less obvious. It just makes it less bearable. And when things become unbearable, people don’t laugh anymore. They do other things.” 🔥💀
Listen in, if you dare…
